(Source: allantruong, via the-doctors-consulting-detective)

gayturians:

lyraffect:

gayturians:

once when i was little, i claimed it was a teacher’s work day so i wouldn’t have to go to school and mom’s not an idiot so of course it didn’t work, but when we got to the school, we found it was a teacher’s work day and that made me think i had super powers so i started trying to kill classmates with my mind to confirm the theory

You thought you had super powers so you immediately attempted to murder everyone

go big or go home

(via surr0undedbyidiots)

me: looks at pet sleeping
pet:
me:
pet:
me:
pet:
me:
pet: breathes
me: oh thank god i thought you died

Of course they know.

[That Vulture article from April 2013]

(via angels-are-watching)

redtigress:

OMG, poor War Machine…

(via bootycap)

gabikki:

In which Jemma Simmons becomes my spirit animal.

(via amypondriversong)

nylooms:

tupacabra:

image

it’s a metaphor

The best part is that the crab is the symbol for the zodiac sign Cancer, so in a way even the crab itself is a metaphor

(via doctaaah)

fueledbyrydenn:

superhighschoollevelgay:

tiny21dancer:

“I guess your grades are more important to you than your morals are,” my English teacher spits out, lecturing our class about cheating that’s been going on in the school.

My classmates and I exchange glances. Well, yeah, we all seem to be thinking together. Isn’t that what they’ve been showing us since middle school?

#also that our grades are more important #than ourselves.

and our mental and physical health.

(Source: dersedaydreaming, via doctaaah)

chuuface:

taylorpotato:

ladyavenal:

Greg is pissed that he was not invited to the stag night.

GUYS. WHAT IF. WHAT IF GREG WAS INVITED. AND HIS LITTLE, “YOU DIDN’T EVEN MAKE IT TO CLOSING TIME” JAB WAS BECAUSE HE WAS SUPPOSED TO MEET THEM AFTER HE GOT OFF WORK AND JUST AS HE WAS LEAVING THEY GOT HAULED INTO THE DRUNK TANK.

I love how John just snaps into the 45 degree angle of pain here

(Source: hbshizzle, via the-doctors-consulting-detective)

starkindustriesamm:

cthulhu-with-a-fez:

the-consulting-timelady:

nathystranger:

“I AM ANGRY, SHORT, AND I HAVE MORE MOVIES THAN YOU. RESPECT ME. STEVE. STEVE. STEVE.”

Oh god, Tony looks so fucking done. “I AM TONY FUCKING STARK. I SHOULD BE TALLER THAN ALL OF YOU. GODAMMIT. PEPPER, GET ME A FOOTSTOOL.”

PEPPER, GET ME A FOOTSTOOL.

I’LL GET YOU 12% OF A FOOTSTOOL.

(via the-doctors-consulting-detective)

rinface:

sammylumpkins:

I love them. 

HAHA WHY YOU MAKE ME LAUGH!

OH MY GOD THE DBZ REFERENCE IN THAT LAST ONE O.O

(via suit-and-bowtie)

              (via whoistorule)

(Source: roobbstark, via suit-and-bowtie)

tomhazeldine:

And in that moment we were the apple guy.

(via suit-and-bowtie)

tyleroakley:

gaytable:

is dan subtly trying to tell several thousand people that he had a dream in which he fucked a horse

the next time I talk to dan i’m bringing this up

(Source: christianoveli, via marc0-butt)

til-the-end-of-the-line-bucky:

❒ Single

❒ Taken

✔ Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky

(via maddymaddsue)

©Sleeplessthemes.com